The Iceman

I started and ended today with a black dread weighing me down and I spent the day at work looking so unhappy that even self absorbed Caspar took a break from his endless array of sexual trysts to ask me if I were ok. I didn’t really have anyone to talk to so I told him in the faint hope he might attempt some sort of intervention but when I said I was going to break an arrangement with Gervais he shook his head sharply and told me not to bother, people don’t win against Gervais.

That was about the extent of his wisdom and he went back to lying to who ever was stupid enough to believe him. After work I decided to go to Djini’s as I was certain that Gervais would seep inside the minute he discovered I was there and after the little Vanderhaven fracas he would be expecting me to do something. I did not have to wait for him for he was already waiting for me. He sat alone looking as smug and as dangerous as he always did and if someone had run him over with a car I don’t think I would have minded one bit. He was his usual smarmy self and waved me over knowing damn well I wasn’t about to refuse so I didn’t bother looking around at anyone else there because I was only there for him and we both knew it. I sat down and he leaned back in his chair all relaxed as if waiting for the show to start. Realising I was the show I tried to take control and say something but my voice wouldn’t work, instead I sat there being miserable while looking at the table.

Tired of my lack of conversation he leaned forward and in his favorite pose put his hand on my arm as if to hold me still, letting me feel him close and I tried not to shudder at his touch. His voice was soft, caressing as if we were lovers and I could feel my spine creep at the sound of it, he smiled and I knew he knew I was shuddering inside. He asked if I had come in to say something to him and I nodded mutely letting him continue smoothly with the question if I was about to say something perhaps like, we did not have to have a deal anymore as a certain young man announced his engagement and was now considered safe from his cousin.

I was paralysed with emotion, I wanted to scream at him but I could only nod and his enjoyment trickled out of him in waves of malicious pleasure. He tilted his head and said that if I happened to find myself attracted to the business partner of this newly engaged person that it would be prudent for me not act upon it. That would be a very unwise idea as the venture these two young men were putting together would suffer greatly if he withdrew his interest. In fact it might be deemed an unsafe investment by others and naturally as a concerned person he would have to warn others away from making poor business decisions.

In his usual oblique creepy Dubois way Gervais was laying it out for me to understand, I was not to break our deal and I was not to see Jojo. I wanted to hit Gervais with something hard and run for my life but instead I heard myself saying that it was not as easy as that as people had expectations of my presence. His face turned to stone and for the first time Gervais ceased being creepy and now was the scary person of legend. His voice was ice and he leaned in so close I could feel the cool mist of his breath freezing me to my soul as I felt the true force of the Dubois will upon me. He said “He can be crushed or he can be prosperous, you will be the one to make that choice.” I pulled my arm away from him and tried to leave but he held onto me while demanding a decision. I had no one to turn to, no place to go, I loved Jojo enough to know that I would not destroy his chance at his dreams in life so I blurted out prosperous and ran out to the parking lot. I hid inside my car shaking until I could barely breathe. Gervais had won again and I was left to freeze in hell.

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