Too Late

….But something answers soft and sad,
'They come, but often come too late.'
Violet Fane

I awoke with thoughts of murder on my mind and sat on the terrace eating breakfast while wondering where to get some dynamite. It seemed that only a few days ago I sat here eating breakfast with Mother while wondering what dress to buy for which party, how rudely the veil of innocence had been ripped from my eyes and there was only one person to blame for that, my intended victim. The logical thing for me to do would be to go onto the net and look up explosives but Zizi warned me against leaving a trail since I planned to be present and a survivor of the disaster, which means I would also be number one suspect. Therefore, whatever my plan entailed I had to ensure that nothing led back to any of us and this complication left me scratching my head. I considered asking Jojo to help as he is daft enough to join in a plot to rid the town of Gervais, despite his history of being seduced by him, I think ruining the happiness of his sister finally sunk into his thick, stupid head that my cousin was indeed bad.

There were only two things about bombs I had learned from movies, dynamite and C4 plastic but how to get, setup and where does one put a bomb in mansion to cause the most damage? The place was just too ginormous to bring down so we needed to only blow up his bedroom, preferably with only him in it as I had no plans to sacrifice myself quite this much. I was happy enough to be the instrument of death but not its associate. A bang on the door interrupts my murderous ruminations and I didn’t need to hear the cluck of Maritka to tell me who was there for Simon has left social niceties at home when dealing with me. He nodded curtly to Maritka before striding onto the terrace, it appears he doesn’t wait for invitations anymore either.

Simon strode in with an arrogance that for me bordered uncomfortably upon ownership, and however much I wanted to glare at his rudeness, I felt that aloof disdain would be a far better weapon. The more I face adversity the more I begin to understand my cousin Liselle and her approach to the world, sometimes you have to keep people away, even the ones you love. Simon folded his arms waiting for me to start the conversation and we sat in silence until Maritka brought him coffee. I gave her a glare, which she managed to deflect with a scowl, and it occurred to me that perhaps she was the reason he was here for I would not leave it beyond her to call him up and invite him along. I knew she was worried about me but nothing, not even solid, reliable Simon was going to deflect me from my goal. If I stopped now I would be forever haunted by Gervais as he had no intention of ever letting me go, he made it clear that our union was to be the future of the Dubois family and not even familial association was going to stop his plan.

Simon asked me what game I thought I was playing and I gave him the cool stare the Dubois women were famous for and asked, “Why? What game would you like me to be up to?” His face became black with anger and I knew my comment had hit its mark. If I kept playing games he would never leave and Simon had no place in my immediate plans so it was time to ensure he was annoyed enough to leave me alone. I told him that I was going up the compound to spend some time with my new family and I thought he was going to choke on the spot. He spluttered for a few minutes before asking me if I had gone crazy, as I knew exactly what Gervais had in mind but I blithely replied not to worry, as I would be staying with Ladonna, which made him snort that she would not be able to stop a determined Gervais. He leaned back in his chair giving me an incredulous stare, then shook his head saying why I would stay with the man I hated with a passion, unless it was to kill him. His comment, something he had thrown casually off the cuff at me caused a slight tremor to my hand as I poured more coffee, something that did not escape him. Simon looked at me in shock for a few seconds then said “Lucinda don’t you even think about going there.”

Our eyes met and for a moment we were suspended in time, two people with no secrets between us, I could see all of him, his past, present and the future he was trying to make and I knew he could see my descent from innocence into the madness I was about to embark on. I saw the slow shadow of defeat etch across his face into an acceptance that he would not distract me. I also knew that he was not about to warn Gervais as secretly in his heart he must want him gone as well. I stood up and showed Simon out saying I was going to spend the afternoon shopping with Zizi, a blatant lie but unfortunately the only talent I had attained since Mother’s death was the ability to look good people in the eyes and lie like the Dubois I am.

I knew that he knew this was far from over and despite him leaving he was going to be an issue I was going to have to deal with while I attempted to put our plan into motion. As soon as his car left the driveway, I called up Ladonna and was pleased to hear the guarded surprise in her voice as that meant she had no idea of my plan. I told her that I was going to take up the offer to visit extended by Gervais but would feel more comfortable staying in her home. Ladonna was shrewd enough to read the real meaning of the words, that staying with Gervais meant inevitable rape and while staying with her might give me some breathing space no one could rule this out, not where he is involved. Ladonna despite her autonomy was wise enough to know that turning me down would entail a very angry man in her household and she gave me a reluctant invitation. She was well aware that in doing so she had put herself in the middle of a war she did not wish to have in her life. I then called Zizi and told her to meet me at the lookout as we had a problem, she queried with Jojo? I replied “Worse, Simon." I left the house after setting in motion the wheels of my emancipation or destruction, only time would tell.

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